Meet the Fockers

Hm. You know what sucks about being so busy with school? There just isn’t enough time to get bored enough to poke fun at bad movies. Because I want to use every single minute of your precious time, I figured I might as well see a decent movie and save the bad ones for when I’m with friends or really, really bored.

I managed to steal two hours from my weekend to see Meet the Fockers. There are a couple of people I know who said they were a little disappointed by it but I personally had a good time watching it. I was laughing my ass off during the entire movie, which was exactly what I needed after a weekend of studying. Although now that I think of it, some of the jokes weren’t all that clever, but maybe that’s just because I’m a bit exhausted right now. Everyone had good performances–this was the first time I’ve ever seen Barbara Streisand act, and she was actually all right. Ooh, and the little kid was just adorable. However, the plot was a little bit convoluted and the character design a little exaggerated. But you don’t watch Meet the Fockers for the plot–you’re watching it for the laughs. It’s a very entertaining movie, but that’s all it is–entertainment. But it made me laugh, so I’m giving it a 3.5/5.

Writing reviews for decent movies is so boring. I hope I get to bash a really awful film soon; I kind of miss doing that.

I’m no music expert, but…

Instead of reading up on some chapters in my Psych book, I watched the American Idol 4 two-hour special instead. Quite honestly? It was hilarious, but incredibly disappointing. While admittedly, those who made it to the next part can sing, none of them really stand out among all the others who participated in the show. The reason why I liked John Stevens (from last season) was because not only was his voice different, it had soul. Not that I have anything against black people, but another thing I noticed in the AI auditions was that everyone who made it (except for the rock star guy) sang r&b or had r&b-ish voices. While it’s nice to listen to at first, it gets kind of tiring afterwards. Are they singing r&b because it’s the in thing now or something? Because if it’s supposed to be their “personal” style, there’s nothing unique about the way they sing. If you close your eyes and just listen, you’ll notice that none of their voices sound any different from the other.

I guess that’s why I wrinkle my nose at pop culture. I don’t believe that bullshit when pop stars say that they’re in the music industry to express themselves because they’re not. Pop stars are there to make money, and the only way they can do that is to appeal to the idiots masses by doing what they want to see. They talk about the ‘hood and scream obsceneties and forget that for a song to be called a song there has to be this thing called a “melody”. I don’t think any of them have the right to be called “artists” because I just don’t see the art in what they do. But that’s just me.

I also find it incredibly ridiculous how all these people are so desperate to get in the show when the American Idols have really lousy terms in their contracts and will probably be dead and forgotten ten years from now. Some girl even sold her wedding ring to pay for the transportation and lodging. While you shouldn’t let anyone get in the way of your dreams, not even your spouse, selling your wedding ring for money just isn’t the way to go about it. I wonder if she can sleep at night with the knowledge that she sold the symbolic representation of her marriage. What a bitch.

So will I be watching American Idol season 4 regularly? Probably not. While the auditions are good for a laugh, the contenders are the very last people on this planet I would idolize, and I’d rather spend my time doing something else.

A Not Entirely Academic, But Completely Idiot-Proof Guide to Julius Caesar

Don’t bother reading the book, Julius Caesar. This is all you really need to know.

The Good Guys:
Caesar
Antony
Octavius
Lepidus

The Bad Guys:
Cassius
Brutus
Casca
Trebonius
Ligarius
Decius
Metellus
Cinna

The Wives:
Calpurnia
Portia

*Caesar arrives in Rome, triumphant*

Plebians: Yay Caesar!

Cassius: Looks like Caesar wants to be a dictator. Let’s kill him.

Casca, Trebonius, Ligarius, Decius, Metellus, Cinna: Okay.

Brutus: But he’s my friend!

*reads letter from plebians, which was actually forged by Cassius*

Brutus: Not anymore.

*the next day*

Calpurnia: Don’t go to the senate today! I dreamt that you died!

Caesar: Okay.

Decius: Go to the senate! They’re giving you the crown today!

Caesar: Okay.

*some shit happens*

Cassius, Casca, Trebonius, Ligarius, Decius, Metellus, Cinna, Brutus: *stabs*

Caesar: *dies*

Antony: Noooooo!

*some more shit happens*

Octavius: Fathur! I will avenge your death!

Antony: Let’s wage war against the traitors.

Octavius, Lepidus: Okay.

Portia: *kills self*

*battle*

Pindarus: Oh no! The enemy is here! We’re all gonna die!!!

Cassius: *kills self*

Pindarus: Oops. Those were actually our soldiers. My bad.

Titinius: *kills self*

Brutus: *kills self*

***THE END***