Coming down the years turned over

Because I can be socially retarded at times, I rarely ever go to parties where I don’t know anyone except the person throwing the party. Being with people I know at social situations–especially if they’re outgoing people–helps boost my confidence and makes me almost as lively and gregarious as they are.

Tonight was Chris’ despidida. I just knew that Stephen would once again be a no-show, but in spite of that and the fact that I was feeling drained from all that studying, I forced myself to go to the party. The guy is my best friend; I spent the best and worst of my high school moments with him, and he’s leaving for Boston on Monday. I can’t just not go to his farewell party because I’m a little afraid to socialize with people I don’t know. So I went.

I spent more time finding my way to Chris’ house than actually staying there. The neighborhood he stays at is so confusing, and it took me a while to remember how to get there since I never pay attention to streets and such when someone else is driving. Eventually I made it, and the moment I stepped in and saw the people I knew I’d have some difficulty socializing. All the people–if not almost all of them–in the room were Chinese, and I could tell that they’ve known each other for quite some time now. But whatever…introductions were made, and now we’re all good friends.

The first fifteen or twenty minutes of the party went better than I expected. For some reason I was able to morph into the friendly version of myself and start talking to people animatedly. There was this girl–I can’t remember if her name was Anya or Tanya–that I kind of got to know, but then her friends arrived and they immediately made a beeline for the bathroom. I was able to talk to some of the guys as well, but then the guys started talking to each other and trading all these inside jokes, so that didn’t work out too well.

(There was this cute guy I had a conversation with. The entire time I was there he was messing around with Chris’ guitar, and he was really good at it too. I know that he goes to UP Manila and I know that he’s taking up Physical Therapy. I can even remember the songs he was playing. But for the life of me, I can’t remember his name. Or the names of the other guys I talked to, for that matter.)

After a while, I said goodbye to the acquaintances I just made and told Chris that I had to go because I needed to get some sleep (which is true). He excused himself and got up from the sofa. “Okay, let me walk you to the door.”

It was raining outside, and since I didn’t have an umbrella we said our goodbyes in the garage. “I’m sorry about that. I know that you don’t really know them that well,” Chris said. “I hope you had a good time anyway…Stephen should have been here,” he said.

I shrugged. “Oh, don’t worry about it, I did. Felt a little awkward, but it wasn’t so bad.”

There was a pause.

“Hey, I’m going to miss you,” he told me.

“I’m going to miss you too,” I said.

We hugged briefly. Chris asked for my e-mail address; he said he’d e-mail me often. I told him to send me his apartment’s address and to expect stuff from amazon.com sometime this month. We hugged again.

“Take care of yourself in Boston.”

“Yeah, you too. I’ll see you in December, all right?”

I nodded and smiled. “Sure!”

I stepped outside and began to walk across the street to where the car was parked. While I was halfway there, Chris called my name.

I paused and looked back. “Yeah?”

He smirked. “Hey, tell Stephen: fuck you!!”

I laughed. “All right.”

I waved at him before turning around and walking the rest of the way. And then I left.