Boys, boys, all types of boys

So I got my rejection letter from Sarah Lawrence today. Strangely enough, I’m not as upset about it as I thought I would be. Of course I’m rather disappointed, but I guess I’ll just deal with it with a fatalistic attitude. Apparently, I’m not meant to go to New York. Guess this means Chris and I won’t be leaving for the States together on August (and speaking of Chris..I forgot to call him again!). I still intend to see if I can transfer to UCLA or Cal State Northridge during my second year of college though. And if I still don’t make it…well, it’s either I keep on trying or just learn to accept the fact that I’m meant to study here. Then I can move out the minute I graduate.

It’s amazing, really, how much a person can change within four years. I hope I don’t change much; I like myself the way I am now.

Laguna was all right. I had a good time even if the resort wasn’t exactly the fanciest place on earth. I suppose country clubs and hotel rooms have spoiled me too much, but seriously. The room we had wasn’t air-conditioned and the walls were so damn thin. I tried to take a nap early this afternoon but I kept waking up every fifteen minutes by the guys’ very loud laughter in the room next door. Plus, there was a karaoke right next to the pool. Thought for the day: why do tone-deaf people love singing at karaoke machines? It’s no wonder people shoot each other at those dingy karaoke bars.

Ex-crush was there! And Maricris told me he wasn’t invited. I guess she changed her mind at the last minute and told him to come along. It was again another lost cause. I didn’t talk to him; he didn’t talk to me (but I think he looked…I think). I don’t mind that we ignored each other, but it’s rather frustrating how the guys I like first never see the things about me that other guys (like Jason) fall for.

Dina’s boyfriend still kept checking me out. Angelica even noticed that he kept trying to go near me and stuff while we were swimming in the pool. I avoided him all day.

Then there was this cute guy I’ve been seeing among Maricris’ friends. I first noticed him at Trina’s debut when he removed his shirt after getting thrown in the pool, but I didn’t say hi or anything like that. The thing is, I forgot his name…it starts with the letter M and it sounds unusual. Anyway, M is quite good-looking and he has this really nice, tanned, toned body (his legs are sexier and more flawless than mine). By some miracle I actually managed to strike up a conversation with him today. He’s really nice and I like the way he makes eye contact with me; reminds me a lot of Jean but minus cocky attitude. After we talked for a couple of minutes, he was like, “How come I’ve never really noticed you before?” I shrugged. “I guess I like keeping a low profile.”

But when I asked him where he’s gonna go to college, he mentioned this certain college for seminarians. His friend interrupted, “M’s gonna be a priest!” My eyebrows completely shot up when I heard that, because M does not look like priest material at all! Priests don’t have atheltic, toned bodies. They don’t have good looks. They certainly don’t have that piercing gaze. Those who do are probably the ones who have mistresses or something. M was like, “You bastard, you shouldn’t have mentioned that to her!”

Oh well. It was all so pointless, and I decided to forget about getting to know the guys after that. They aren’t really my type anyway. Personality-wise and brain-wise.

(This just goes to show that so far, no other guy I know has ever measured up to Jason. I still highly doubt there’s anyone else out there who is as wonderful as him.)