Their small-town eyes gape at you in dull surprise

October 7th, 2002 with 130 views

There’s this Korean girl in my school. She’s a freshman and I don’t know what her name is, but I want to get to know her because she seems really nice and awfully lonely. I see her sitting by herself at the cafeteria a lot. I thought it might be because she gets snubbed by the other girls, but once when I saw this other freshman try to sit with her, she kind of ignored her. Then I overheard their conversation and realized that the only reason why that girl was sitting at her table was because she wanted to borrow some money. So I came up with the conclusion that she’s alone because she wants to be alone. Cos she can’t take everybody else’s crap.

I guess I know how she feels. When I was a new student, I felt extremely out of place in my school. I was totally ostracized at first because I made the mistake of speaking to my new classmates in English. Imagine how she must feel. She doesn’t know a word of Tagalog, and not many people at my school speak English well. I have a feeling that she might not be very good at English herself cos I always see her reading these Korean pocketbooks. How frustrating not to know a single person you can relate to. Specially in high school.

When I saw that happen, I wanted to invite her to sit with Angelica and I. But out of nowhere, Alys plopped down on the empty seat next to me and the opportunity was lost.

I saw her crying in the hallway this morning. I wanted to talk to her, reach out to her in some way. Tell her to ignore whoever it is that pissed her off, that maybe she can move to a high school with a more open-minded and diverse student body next year. But then Angelica and I were late for class.

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7 Responses to “Their small-town eyes gape at you in dull surprise”

BLOGGED ---at the-protagonist.net on October 7, 2002 06:09 pm
[...] ted to talk to her, reach out to her in some way. [read more?] lauryn @ 06:07 amComments ( [...]
Amanda on October 8, 2002 01:12 am
I hope that you get a chance to befriend this girl, or at least try…I think a lot of people can relate to how she feels; I know I can. Good luck with that…
Joanna on October 8, 2002 02:01 am
Keep trying to reach out to this girl. You always seem so considerate about others, like you try to make people feel welcome…I’m sure she’ll appreciate it. Good luck!
Kat on October 8, 2002 04:48 am
don’t give up on this girl. she wants to be reached– that is why she makes it so difficult.
nikkiana on October 8, 2002 05:57 am
Yeah. Keep reaching out!
Daynah on October 8, 2002 04:12 pm
I hope you get an opportunity to talk to her. I remember when I first started school. I didn’t know English at all. I started first grade, and all I saw were people making fun of me, although I didn’t know they were. I was a loner; I spent my recess just sitting on the swings in the corner of the playground waiting for the bell to ring so I can go back to class. There weren’t many Asians at the elementry at that time so I looked like a total oddball. I really wish there was someone I could talk or even have something in common with. There were even times when I cried because I was so sad… I didn’t even want to go to school anymore cause I felt so alone. The first year at any new place is difficult. I’m glad first grade was finally over. heh So keep trying to reach out to her.
Chris on October 8, 2002 08:15 pm
everyone needs a friend Lauryn, even if they want to be alone because they are diefferent than the rest. Just knowing that they have someone who cares can brighten their day and make living in the phillipines not so bad.