Been there, done that, don’t have the t-shirt

Tonight was an epiphany. I’m not sure if I enjoyed it or anything, but it certainly was an experience. I went to the Freakshow (the first Pulp Rock Awards) with Dina tonight. I almost didn’t get to go cos Dina’s childhood friend Renzo couldn’t go, and her mom wanted Renzo to be with her so he could protect us. But somehow she managed to convince her mom to let us go without him anyway. I don’t really like the dude, but when we were there I realized that even though I don’t think much of him he would’ve protected us from those..freaks. No wonder it’s called Freakshow; most of the guys present were really freaky. It’s free admission which is why there were all sorts of people there. Jologs people mostly. It surprised me to see that some little kids were present along with their rocker moms and dads. Cool, I thought. I’m not sure I’d like to bring my kids to a rock concert though. I mean, what if they get injured by all those people jumping around> There were also some girls in halter tops, which was a really dumb idea. You don’t wear halter tops to a rock concert, especially if there are a lot of masa people present. And there were only like, four or five passable-for-cute guys. The most good-looking of the guys I liked looked like a thin, Filipino version of James Van Der Beek and I really wanted to get to know him. But you know how I’m really lousy when it comes to the guys I like; I never know what to say to them. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is one reason why I think I’ll remain a bachelorette.

I’m not really a fan of Filipino rock bands, cos they sound like different versions of each other. It was hard to identify which band was which cos all their songs were so alike. But nobody seemed to mind. The only reason why I really wanted to be there tonight was so I could go moshing for the first time, and also to check out how people reacted to the bands. It didn’t surprise me that there was not a single band with a female frontman who performed. Goddamn chauvenist pigs. I swear, my band will be the first rock band with a female frontman. All those other Korn-wannabes could just nurse their sorry asses.

So on to my moshpit experience. At around ten p.m. it started to drizzle, and people began leaving the crowded areas to get shelter from the rain. As if there was any shelter that could protect them. That was our opportunity. While everybody was making their way out, Dina and I were the only ones going the opposite direction. We were just about twenty feet or so from the stage when it stopped drizzling and people started coming back. And then Greyhoundz (or was that Chicco Science?) started to perform.

How does one describe what it feels like to be in a mosh pit? Well…I really had fun at first. Dina and I were holding hands really tightly so we won’t separate; it’s a big place and it would be hard to find each other if we get lost. Everybody (mostly guys) was slamming against me and we were sort of like, carried by the crowd. But I didn’t mind; I was laughing and shrieking and I felt like I was flying. That, I suppose, is what it’s like to be really high. I was just…floating.

But then the crowd started to get a little too wild during the next song. I was no longer being pushed–this time, people were shoving at us. I was scared I would fall to the ground and then people would trample on me. I’ve heard it happen on some boy band’s concert. And then somebody hit me really hard and I was sent reeling towards this guy. My head hit his head and it huuuurrrrt. Jesus Christ, I actually saw the world in psychedelic colors. That scared me and fearing worse injuries, I dragged Dina out of the moshpit into safer ground. She didn’t mind cos she was dying to go out as well; the air was thick with other people’s carbon dioxide and some sleaze wrapped his arms around her waist twice. Thank God nobody tried to take advantage of my vulnerable situation by feeling me up or something. Now that would be really scary. How can guys stand mosh pits?

It felt like I had a really bad stiff neck and by the time I stopped feeling dizzy, I heard a crash and felt something hard like glass rain down on my head. Whirling around, I learned that some guy hit this other guy on the head with a glass bottle. The guy that was hit was holding the back of his head and looked really pained.

“I want to live to see sixteen,” I remarked, and dragged Dina out of there once more.

Reeling from the incidents and pissed about my aching neck, I actually, actually shouted at the moshing crowd, “MGA PUTANG INA KAYO!” Dina looked at me, surprised, and yanked my arm. Oh my God. The jologs crowd must’ve had some sort of effect on me. I never, ever cuss in Filipino. Never. It really surprised me when I said that; maybe my minor accident made me delirious. But I hope this will be the last time I will ever have the audacity to do that. I expected to be hit on the head with a glass bottle after saying that as well; fortunately, none of the sort happen. But I think people were staring at me.

We spent the rest of our time looking at the booths and then chilling at the back and just listening to the..well, it wasn’t really music. I wanted to buy this shirt that said “I survived the Pulp Freakshow” but I was short of twenty bucks. Dina had no money either and the girl refused to sell it to me. What the hell is twenty bucks to them? It’s not going to ruin them or anything. It irritated me and I almost, almost resorted to asking people around if they had twenty bucks to spare. But I could never bring myself to do that and I had to resort to buying the poster instead. The poster looks nice but it has a girl in a bikini on it. My dad goes in my room sometimes because I have a big mirror and I’d hate to think of what would happen to me if he sees that on my wall. He’d probably think I’m some sort of lesbian or something. He’s really conservative you know.

So here I am, nursing my slightly-injured neck with some medicated plaster. Even though it wasn’t all fun, I don’t regret going there at all. I just wish there were more decent people around though. And it certainly would’ve been really fun if more people were with us. This is probably the last time I’ll ever go to a free admission rock concert, because you don’t have to watch the bands perform to see a freak show. I think I’ll just stick to Barbie’s Cradle gigs or something.